How not to build your Twitter following

I had nothing better to do this week so I thought I’d take a look at a couple of those sites you can use to build your Twitter following. You know, sites like Tweetbig and Twiends. I know that’s important to us writers, so I decided to waste a little capital on what I, and possibly you, already know.

Tweetbig (or Tweet fuck all, as it’s more commonly known)
Offers to build your following, targeting it to successful tweeters who match your criteria. Nice simple interface with a sections for keywords and successful accounts. But either they’ve gone away for the holidays or they just don’t give a shit. Their 24/7 support is non-existent and, apart from an initial flurry of followers, nothing much happened.

Ziggy’s verdict:Take the old adage, if it sounds too good to be true, then it probably is. Avoid like the plague.

Twiends
On the surface Twiends seems like a good idea but if you’re serious about getting targeted followers who are more likely to engage with your business/ideas/website etc, then frankly it’s just a load of bunkum. Twiends basically offers incentives for people to follow you in the form of credits. You buy credits, the credits get offered to people who can’t be arsed to buy them. It sounds complicated but it’s not really.

You’ll get a lot of followers for your twitter account but they’ll follow you to earn credits to get people to follow them and they won’t be at all interested in what you have to offer. Maybe if the guys at Twiend tweak the product it might be useful for those of us who want to grow a meaningful following – at the moment it falls pretty short of the mark.

Ziggy’s verdict: I really wanted this one to work and I kind of like the idea. But somehow, like most of the other develop your twitter following sites, it’s just lacking something somewhere….mmmm…I wonder what it is….Thanks to Twiend I’m now being followed by a Filipino prostitute, a transsexual serial killer and a nihilistic penguin called reggie…and a nice looking girl from Egypt who seems to like to post all the English Premier football scores…go figure…

And one other Twitter thing…

Something else is pissing me off about these sites – when you try to get a review, Google has been flooded with “fake” testimonials on just about every site there is to have a testimonial/review. This is basically what bad companies do to dampen the affect of bad press or bad reviews. They pay people in india 2 pence a day to write countless blog and mock press releases that clog up the system. People generally tend to look at the first couple or so pages of a search, so if you can fill that all up with good reviews you can reduce the damage done by adverse publicity. Get my drift???

The guys at Twiend and Tweetbig know this. Let me say that again: The guys at Twiend and Tweetbig know this! (Just see if I can’t improve the SEO ranking of this blog entry for Twiend and Tweetbig). Anyway, here’s the thing. I would be quite happy to pay a reasonable amount for a targeted, useful following. I’m not prepared to pay for something I could quite easily do myself without breaking sweat.

I know that Twitter puts barriers in the way of companies like TweetBig and Twiends, but, for god’s sake guys, stop taking us for a ride will yah!!! Give us something we can goddamn use, you goddamn fakers you!!!

 Ziggy’s Top Tip: You’re better off with 10 good followers who will retweet you than 1,000 fuckwits who won’t even look at their twitter account again. Build your twitter following slowly and don’t fret about having thousands of “adoring” fans (they’re not adoring, they’re not even looking in your direction, stupid, they don’t even have their goddamn PC on…capiche???)

Okay, so I was going to do a few more reviews. But then I had a couple of scotches and I thought: WTF, the rest of them aren’t going to be any different…

There, I haven’t had a rant in ages, so it’s out now, and I feel all the better for it. 

Let me know if you’ve had any “good” experience of sites like these, or maybe you’d just like to reinforce the bad ones…I need another drink…yah-de-yah…

UPDATE: Wow, they added a Justin Beiber fan site to my following…I am honoured…

Just an update (6th Jan 2011): With Twiends I got around 5,000 followers which looked good until I realised they  might as well be cake sprinkles for all the good they do. They sit there, don’t even wave. And then, yesterday, TweetBig, the big fat con artists, took $15 out of my paypal account without my permission. My advice: Give both these companies a wide berth, Twiends is essentially pointless, TweetBig…well you can make up your own mind about them…

9 thoughts on “How not to build your Twitter following

  1. Finally, someone has the stones to say what every writer worth their laptop time is thinking: Do I really need to resort to software to build a following? Isn’t it more rewarding to let people find me by liking what they read? That’s what I would do if I admired someone’s work. Oh, wait, it already is…

  2. I was going to jump on this and point out that there *are no shortcuts* to truly useful networking. It takes time and continual effort and willingness to add honest value to your followers.But you got there ahead of me. Good for you.

  3. Huge round of applause! There are far too many sites these days offering the world for a couple of quid (or bucks). I’ve never come across a site like this that actually fulfills promises. These sites have turned good old fashioned ‘time’ and ‘effort’ into naughty words… Great post.

  4. Totally agree. With Twitter, quality is so much more important than quantity. But honestly, I tweet because I like it, not so much just to gain followers. But now that I have a core group of good followers, more good people are finding *me*. Bread upon the water.

  5. Twiends is still actually adding to my account, which is fine, I don’t have to follow them… but a I’ll end up with a thousand useless followers, just like Jesus!!!

  6. I wonder if Twiends is pronounced to rhyme with “friends” or “fiends”? They probably insist the former, but the latter sounds more appropriate.I kind of think adding followers is like “adding inches” if you know what I mean… and about as effective.

  7. If it weren’t for Twitter, I wouldn’t have had an opportunity to guest blog here at The Feckless Goblin! Thanks.

  8. Have you given TweetingMachine a try? I’m still unsure about it…

  9. I didn’t even know there were services out there for stuff like that. Honestly, unless you’re trying to win a popularity contest, I can’t imagine it’s worth it. Though I’ve read, once you reach a certain level of twitter fame, everyone and their mothers want to follow you. But are they listening? 🙂

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